My Journey to Orthodoxy

A recent convert shares his journey from Judaism to Orthodox Christianity:

When Jesus turned and saw them following, he said to them, ‘What are you looking for?’ They said to him, ‘Rabbi’ (which translated means Teacher), ‘where are you staying?’ He said to them, ‘Come and see.’ (John 1: 38 – 39)

How it began

In 2004 I was invited to meet with my local Greek Orthodox community at the end of Divine Liturgy. Hating to be late anywhere I turned up early, I was also unsure exactly where the church was. I wandered into the service to find nowhere to sit, not because there wasn’t space but because there weren’t any chairs. In the middle of the church was a stand with a number of icons on it, next to it there were candles burning. All around me there were pictures and in front of me there was a screen with doors open and two priests leading the service. To the right was a choir of three women. The rest of the space was filled with people. These people seemed to move around, there were children crawling between legs and there was an intense sense of prayer and devotion. I felt that I had stumbled into something that I couldn’t quite put into words.

At the meeting I met Orthodox Christians from across the world, Greeks, Arabs, Russians, Romanians as well as local people from the UK. There were also other non-Orthodox there too from a variety of religious traditions.

A niggle

From that time on I had a desire to return to find out more. I didn’t feel that I could simply drop in again so I started to read. I bought a number of books and started to read. Some of the books were introductions to Orthodox, some were about the Orthodox life of prayer and the liturgy, and others were on Orthodox theology and ethics. This reading I disguised as simply informing myself about a Christian tradition where I had very little experience or knowledge.

Part of my work and family commitments take me away from home and I thought to myself that perhaps my experience of Orthodoxy was atypical so I visited other Orthodox churches, some Greek (in England and Greece), some Russian (in England), one Romanian (in Italy) and a cathedral in Finland. The more I attended Orthodox churches the more at home I felt. No one ever asked me if I was Orthodox or not and no one asked me about my background or beliefs. There was never a sense of pressure. I did, though, learn how to light candles, cross myself and generally blend in.

Disturbing questions

The more I read and visited churches the more disturbed I became about who and what I was. To understand this you’d have to know that I’m Jewish and a community leader as well. People associate me with being Jewish – a very public face. I had a deep feeling that I could no longer lead Jewish worship or Torah study and slowly began to withdraw from the community. My family was bemused. I felt that I was in danger of betraying others whilst trying to be true to myself. It became something to be hidden from others. I used pressure of work to explain my change of involvement and found myself replacing my Siddur with an Orthodox Christian prayer book. It was not until 2012, eight years on, that I broached the subject of becoming an Orthodox Christian.

I also started to think of my relationship to other Christian denominations. Perhaps it was Jesus that I was attracted to as opposed to a denomination. I started visiting other churches and experiencing their services. Somehow, though, other churches didn’t seem quite right.

Visiting the priest

There came a point where I wanted to be more than a visitor to Orthodox churches but to be part of the Orthodox Church. The priest’s first question about what this would do to my family and what did my wife think. He told me that the church wasn’t about breaking up families. It was only after my wife had ‘given permission’ that any serious conversation could begin. Months passed and nothing happened, formally. I started going to services when I could. I went back to the parish priest and we started a formal process. Given my ‘status’ in the Jewish community the Archbishop was approached for guidance, as was a more local Bishop. At the beginning of Great Lent 2014 I became a catechumen.

I was given more reading and started to explore more and more what being Orthodox meant in practice. I also was recommended to approach a sponsor, someone who’d support me by answering questions and standing by me when I was received into the Church. Father recommended an Orthodox Christian from Syria.

Prayer, fasting and alms giving

Before Great Lent started I began to keep Orthodox Christian discipline in regard to fasting. During Lent I was vegan + (plus no wine or cooking oil most days), with the exception of the Feast of the Annunciation and Palm Sunday when I ate fish. Whenever possible I attended the Lenten Services. Each Sunday Gospel during Lent is intended for those who are to be baptised, chrismated and receive the mystery of communion.

Being the only vegan + in the house was challenging but not impossible. In fact that was nothing really in relation to what I had to do in Holy Week. On the Monday of Holy Week after the Bridegroom Service I had to go to confession. This was in the body of the church sitting next to the priest on the bench at the side. No box and not hidden away. Where to start was the first issue and where to stop the second. Under the guidance of the priest it went well.

The Pascha (Easter) Service

My reception was to be at the Pascha Service which started at 9.30 pm on the Saturday night before Easter Sunday morning. It was my, and my family’s, first experience of an Orthodox Pascha – I hadn’t told them that it would not finish for over three hours! It is not the place to go into the details of the service and I am still reflecting on what happened and how it felt. One thing that attracted me to Orthodoxy, as opposed to other expressions of Christianity, was the focus on the Resurrection as opposed to the Cross, not that Cross is absent. At the service I really did experience the deep joy of the Resurrection, especially when I received communion.

A new beginning

I realised on Holy Pascha (Easter Sunday) that far from arriving I was just setting off. I had come and seen, as in the Gospel, and I have found myself following Jesus. I have written about becoming an Orthodox Christian but not really about becoming one with Christ. What attracted me to Orthodoxy was its emphasis on unity with God through Christ. The emphasis on encounter and prayer and the simplicity and humility in the people I met set me on a path that I hope will lead to God to perfecting those attributes in me. Through the mysteries (sacraments), through the action of the Holy Spirit I hope to become more and more Christ like. I know that this will be a struggle. At the moment I am still in the first tender steps of my Orthodoxy and my relationship with God. My ‘Godfather’ has a new child, and I have two new sisters (and my Arabic is improving as is my Greek).

And finally

My family still can’t quite make sense of my conversion but they are supportive. My friends meet the news with a range of responses. I feel that after a decade I am where I should be and am prepared for the next stage. At no time did I feel pressured to become Orthodox and at the liturgy I proclaimed that this was something that I did of my own free will. In fact I was never made to feel lacking or sinful, which doesn’t mean that I don’t experience my own sinfulness. This lack of emotional manipulation that I had experienced in some other Christian churches enabled my to make a decision that was for positive reasons. Put simply to become a disciple of Jesus Christ. I came, I saw, I followed and am following still.